Most Socialist President of the USA

Penguinbane is gone. Our dear beloved Newt Gingrich. Although he made unrealistic statements about space, loved God, despised the left and was renowned for his interest in popular hygiene, Penguinbane somehow did not succeed in his ultimate quest to become President of the United States (POTUS). Coincidentally an anagram of POTUS is POUTS, and pouting being one of the myriad of reactions that comes to mind when I hear a little smidgeon of this on my television late at night.

“As to the presidency, I’m asked sometimes is Mitt Romney conservative enough? And my answer is simple – compared to Barack Obama? You know, this is not a choice between Mitt Romney and Ronald Reagan. This is a choice between Mitt Romney and the most radical leftist president in American history.

Pengun Vs Gingrich

You’re Either On One Side Or The Other

To be correct I didn’t pout. I got up off my seat, walked over to the television and said the word “no” loudly and repeatedly, with intermittent inclusion of “idiot”. My beef? Udder than the supposed fact that conservative is now a byword for “best”, the equally intangible statement that Obama is the most radical leftist president in American history. Please. I live in Australia and I know that not to be the case, as much as my subversive little heart wishes otherwise. I will present to Penguinbane three arguments. Three presidents who were more socialist than Barrack Obama.

El Presidente Uno: Theodore Roosevelt.

Oh Teddy! Interventionist hero of the Spanish Wars, roughrider, game hunter and all round badass! He rode meese and strangled nakeds with his bear hands! Often ranked within the 5th best presidents of all time! Is he not more conservative than Chuck Norris? Well aside from his Spaniard ousting adventures overseas, Theodore Roosevelt was famous for his trust busting. That’s right, the evil statist restraint of capitalism’s ethereal invisible hand, infringing the abilities of hardworking honest industrialists to gain monopolies on certain sectors of the economy. Also he was a greenie. He basically created national parks and was avowed conservationist. He would have liked the EPA and wind farms if Marx magic were able to resurrect his corpse today. Verdict? Tree-hugging liberal.

Der Prasident Zwei: Franklin Delano Roosevelt.

A distant cousin of Teddy, and therefore a commie by default, Franklin Delano Roosevelt is often rated as one of the USA’s greatest presidents, for his skillful steering of America out of the Great Depression and into World War Two. FDR’s package to revive the ailing United States was disgusting heartless communist filth that worked quite effectively if some historians are to believed. It was based around not only the recovery of the economy to normal levels, but more decisively “relief” for the unemployed and “reform” to prevent the Great Depression from happening again. That means wealth redistribution and regulation kiddos, and that’s socialist. FDR’s New Deal also relied on massive public works programs to provide employment to proletarian scum and revitalise sections of the economy that deserved to die. Though much headway has been made by a series of more sane governments that have eroded FDR’s evil regulations, and made the natural profitable cycles as seen in the Global Financial Crisis possible again, socialist anathemas like the Tennessee Valley Authority and the outdated anti-market concept of “social security” still exist.

Workers Toil Soviet-Like Together

Soviet Union Socialist Realism? Or Timberline Lodge Oregon?

Le President Trois: Dwight Eisenhower

Dwight, like T. Roosevelt at first glance does not seem fairly socialist. He was a Republican. He was a five-star general who put all of Western Europe under the stars and stripes. He became the super commander of NATO, intervened in Iran and Guatemala to topple left leaning democratic leaders and replace them  in national interest. But all this doesn’t diminish his socialist aspect. After all, did not Trotsky believe in a world revolution? Did not the Comintern specialise in the creation in the contamination of precious bodily fluids across the world? The fact remains that although Ike fought the Soviets back like a true patriotic son, his national policy would be condemned as socialist if put forward today. What did he do? Well for starters the top tax rate in Eisenhower’s reign was 94%. Today Obama’s trying on his class warfare to raise it to 40%. He ordered the state build highways, rather than rely on friendly private corporations and expanded exponentially on the disgusting social security FDR forced on the brave American populace. He also tyrannically placed in troops to enforce educational integration at Little Rock, Arkansas. Astronomical taxes, builds autobahns, gives money to filthy poor folk, makes war on conservative values. Eisenhower is undoubtedly a Red. If only McCarthy had spotted him and acted accordingly.


So next time you hear, or perhaps even yourself spout, Penguinbane’s misplaced rhetoric, actually consider America’s history, and realise that Obama is not socialist. He’s a moderate conservative, well to the right of Eisenhower and most centre-right christian democrats in Europe. Peace fraternal and sisternal comrades, and please rectify any errors this hapless Australian has made. Read here for an interesting more comprehensive version I’ve found.


2 thoughts on “Most Socialist President of the USA

  1. Well, you’ve got a better grasp on American history than most of the American undergrads I currently teach. FDR was kind of amazing, and a lot of his New Deal programs are ones we could really use, in updated/modified form, right now. Ditto TR’s trustbusting anti-robber-baron activity. Eisenhower is an interesting choice; I’ve read a fair bit of WWII-era history that discusses him as a general, and I was surprised at how much I respect him. He was a good leader, a good general, and he didn’t put up with any weird bullshit when orders came along like “protect European art,” or “integrate black troops and make sure the white folks don’t mess with them.” Eisenhower is also noted for his obviously-ignored warning about the dangers of the “military-industrial complex,” an interesting warning coming from a man who is essentially the anthropomorphized Army. I’ve also come across posts here and there about *Reagan’s* policies, about which I admittedly know very little; by today’s idiotic “tea party” standards, even Reagan looks like a wackadoo lefty socialist.

    I think that in his innermost heart, Obama would be at least solidly liberal-left, if not actually progressive, or -gasp!-socialist. But the nature of American “politics,” which has devolved into playground bullying by morons, means Obama has had to move ever rightward to get anything done, at all. It’s disheartening and horrifying.
    People in the United States are shockingly ignorant about American history, and the media and people are shockingly unwilling to even admit that there may be any complexities afoot, anywhere, about anything, let alone engage meaningfully with those complexities. Thus dumbassery from Gingrich et. al. is believed by millions of even bigger dumbasses, who somehow believe that inherited-wealth millionaires are speaking with the Voice of the People.

    In case it is somehow unclear, I really, really, really want to emigrate to a rational country where everyone believes in science and history and social safety nets as a matter of course, and where “socialist” and “communist” are adjectives, not invective.

  2. Wow, such an excellent well though out post. Thank you! (Unfortunately I’ve got this nagging feeling of self doubt now that I sound like Wayne off Wayne’s World)

    The part about Obama being more progressive by heart is quite enlightening, and something, to my detriment, I hadn’t thought about extensively. The accumulation of money and power, that’s transforming into political capital I see as natural in this system. Answer? Reform, or watch your society slowly burn around your ears.

    If the latter begins to occur, which I hope it doesn’t, one of the best options I think is emigration. I sound quite doomsday here. Hopefully its unwarranted.

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